Coffee is Vile!

You coffeeholics/jazz-a-philes are going to really hate me now.

Coffee is VILE. Blech! Today I went to Starbucks, and because it was a nice sunny, warm day, I decided to get one of their summer drinks: Bananas & Cream Frappuchino Blended Creme (with no whipping cream).

First, the barista gave me the drink with whipping cream. I pointed out her mistake, so she fixed it. As I went to take a swig of my cool drink, VILENESS hit my mouth! She made me a Banana Coconut Frappuchino Blended Coffee! Yes, it was the wrong drink. With icky coffee in it!
After nearly choking to death, I pointed out her error (yet again) and she finally whipped up the correct drink (with no whipping cream). And like a good little Starbuck employee, gave me a coupon for a free drink as a gesture of goodwill (I now have two coupons, the other I got from a similar incident). Anyways, the drink tasted like a banana milkshake.

I had to explain to my boss why I was late for a meeting with him. I told him about my near death experience. I also told him that I hate the smell of coffee. He asked me how I every survived walking into Starbucks each time. I told him that I've perfected the art of not breathing through my nose whenever I smell vileness. Really, it's quite a handy skill to have.